Smiles, Lies, and Neighborly Ties
One Friday evening after work, a colleague and I decided to head to his place to unwind. Being new to the US, he was still adjusting to American culture. Upon arriving, we cracked open our beer cans and began chatting. After a while, he leaned in close and whispered something in my ear.
“Dude, guess what? I might be getting lucky soon,” he said, winking.
“Seriously? That’s fast for a newcomer! Who’s the lucky girl?” I asked, intrigued.
“It’s the girl next door! Her name is Emily and she’s smoking hot. She lives solo in the apartment next to mine, and I think she likes me,” he replied, grinning.
“Awesome! So, when’s the big date?” I asked.
“Oh, no. We haven’t really talked. Just exchanged hellos a couple of times,” he confessed.
“What? You mean you haven’t even had a real conversation? Then, how do you know she’s interested?” I asked, surprised.
“Trust me, every time we cross paths, she gives me this big, bright smile,” he insisted.
“Wait, everyone does that here in America. Look, I don’t want to burst your bubble, but she’s probably just being a friendly neighbor. Why not ask her out? If she’s really interested, she’ll hang out with you,” I suggested, doling out relationship advice like a guru who’s learned from a string of dating misadventures.
“Hmm… That’s a good idea. I think I should do that,” he replied confidently.
After dinner, I headed home, largely forgetting our conversation until a few days later when I ran into him again, triggering my memory of the neighborly saga.
“Hey, how did it go with the neighbor girl?” I asked eagerly.
“Don’t even ask, man. It stings,” he replied with a sigh.
“So, the next day, as usual, she greeted me with a smile and hello. I said Hello too with a cheerful smile and asked her if she would like to go out for a movie with me,” he recounted, shoulders slumping.
“Oh boy, I see where this is going. You jumped straight to asking her out for a movie without building a connection first? That’s like going to the grand finale without the opening act.” I remarked. “And what did she say?” I inquired further.
“She thanked me but mentioned she had a boyfriend. But, I’ve never seen her with anyone. Maybe she made it up? And what about all those smiles she gave me?” he pondered aloud.
“Those smiles were just friendly gestures. It’s common here in America. But don’t let it bring you down. Consider it a lesson learned. Better luck next time,” I consoled, hoping to lift his spirits.
“But seriously, man, next time, maybe start with a conversation about something other than movies. Like, I don’t know, her pet dog or the weather in New Jersey,” I added with a grin.
“Yeah, I’ll remember that. Thanks, buddy,” he nodded with a mix of disappointment and hope, completely oblivious to the fact that the advice was coming from someone who had once regaled his own dates with thrilling tales of his H1B visa struggles and doomsday preparations. If only he knew his crash course in American dating was being taught by the king of first-date fiascos! The irony was not lost on either of us.
